Tuesday, November 08, 2005
a glimpse of my mind.to keep a count,
all the ones that i love have told me to give up on you.
to just let go of you finally,
and get it over with.
they hate seeing me upset all this time,
becuase they care for me,
and rather see me glad, than sad.
but it's amusing to see,
i'm still battling it out to not give up on you.
it's really hard on me..you know?
i dont even have much back to support my strength in you,
i'm enduring this one by myself really.
i have God, but i dont know his plan...
so i can only wait it out.
but for what i know,
many have suggested i surrender the battle now.
i simply knocked it off and said no.
i take on this battle more and more,
even after every kind of piercing through my heart.
you're worth it to me.
you know i love and care for you very deeply,
you know i'd drop everything for you (if you ask),
you acknowledge all this...but then why must you..
why must you hurt me so much?
why must you turn away from me?
why must you close that door right to my face?
space you need...space i give you.
but can't you at least talk with me?
why must i feel so empty when i'm in a room with you?
a sense of despair runs over me.
i try my efforts to stay strong,
but it's really difficult to go on...
i'm falling really weak,
weak to the point that i want to give up..
but there's just something about you,
that just tells me to stand up tall and not let you go.
you know how it feels to be ignored,
especially when it's someone that you care so deeply for,
but then why must i feel that very same way?
why must you do it back to me?
i endured it with you; when you felt the bad times with others..
but for me, it seems like you're gone...
why is it so unfair?
i honestly do not know why i haven't given up on you,
but to me, it's really worth it.
worth the pain; worth the time; worth the effort.
with all my efforts in place,
i long for the day when you and i are back together the way we used to be.
i enjoyed those days, and i miss it.
heart-ache-ingly,
stan.
¤¤ stan blogged at
6:15:00 PM
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2 Comments:
you never give up on things you love.
funnyyyyy i was just watching naruto eps bri gave me, and this guy was like "you become truly strong when you fight for somebody important to you". and right now you're going through this battle because of somebody who you value. and that's what makes you strong, not weak. the fact that you can love somebody so much that you'd give up everything for him/her in an instant. that kind of love makes you strong beyond belief. that kind of love is untrump-able.
so don't think of yourself as getting weaker and weaker. because you aren't. you're getting stronger.
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