Thursday, November 25, 2004
but in the other hand, it makes me sad to see thsoe i truly care about sad. What hurts more to you? yourself getting hurt or seeing your loved one hurt or upset? to me, seeing the other hurt and that i cannot do anything..but merely asking how they're doing.. that hurts me quite a lot. standing there...helpless, but still want to help. it hurts to see tears coming down your eyes, and it hurts to see that i can't do anything much except stand by you at all times. i duno what's going on, but i wanna know, but for now, i just pray that everything will continue to be smooth in your life.--for whatever reason, i hope that problem will be solved.
anywho......i'm outty XD
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Tuesday, November 23, 2004
What can i say, except for the fact that i have one of the stupidest and stubborn teacher that can't even do her own job right? she teaches art and "has" her bachelors for art. haven't seen any of that ability around though, never have i seen anything done from her that impressed me the slightest bit within my near-coming 3 years at pca. she is just so stubborn and retarded that she doesn't even do her job correctly. She comes in the classroom, yells couple of lines and "instructions" that aren't even clear to the class and mixes stuff up 99% of the time (with no exaggeration) which puzzles many students, including myself. On top of that, she's late to arrive to the classroom another 90% of the time..with the excuse of "forgetting about the class." What does this show? i'll tell you, lack of responsibility to her class and her students. She doesn't even keep us in her priorities, or at least she can't convince she does to anyone--which again includes myself. Her instructions in the different "assignments" are so broad and very hard to comprehend by the average mind, you have to go through a large thinking process to actually understand such pathetic teacher. Her assignments are mostly REPEATS of the previous assignment, but with a little twist to it (barely one.) For example, she would give an assignment of making a DVD cover, then the next assignment she gave was a book cover, then a CD cover. Now can you tell me the main difference between these? there ain't one. you're right. actually there is...the measurements. Wow, that's a whole lotta change. The biggest difference in her assignments was the "revolution from drawing art into computer art." But see, did she even take the time to consider or even mark our past assignments that each of us worked hard upon? From what's given, it does not seem like it.. you might be thinking, you're just imaginging it stan. but hey, try this one: she can't even give out a mark when you ask her for what you got, then you ask if you can see the books with the marks..and she would either reply with "no you can't" (without reasoning) or "yeah, but i'll show you tomorrow, i don't have it with me, but i'll show you tomorrow" (then never shows you again and expecting you to forget or not ask again) or "nobody did bad, everyone did good. don't worry." (ok this is not the point, i ask for my marks because i actually want to see how i'm doing and how the teacher obtains my mark. This is for educational purposes, that teacher does not have the right to not give out our marks.) Wanna know why she always have to put excuses up? cuz clearly she doesn't have any of those done, or she just randomly picks numbers in accordance to her love towards the student or her favor towards them. it doesn't matter if you're actually good or not, or if you have the skills or not. As long as she likes you, you're fine. but if yo'ure on her tail, then you have a problem for life. and in my case, i'm on her tail without any reasoning. she just decided to get peeved about me and start to pms again me most of time...she doesn't pick on other people but mainly me. (rarely does she complain or rant about another person.) why? until this day i still don't know. Her reasoning you ask? here it is: "i dont respect her and i give her attitude, and she doesn't like how i always stand during class." Ok woman, this is a free farking country, i can do whatever the heck i want. If you don't have logic in telling me to sit down, why should i give a single in listening to her? she tells me to sit down with the reasoning of "it makes me feel uncomfortable, and it makes me lose power." Ok what kind of excuse is that? telling me to sit down which gives her more authority.. i haven't heard that from any other teacher, but they still have authority when i'm standing up. It shouldn't matter what a student is doing, the teacher should always have authority over their studnets because they are given that responsibility and power. You don't need studnets to actually do something, IN ORDER for you to gain that power. if you're able to teach and have a convincing ability to hold the class together, as well as something to actually respect. Does she have any of the above? nope, none of it. she doesn't have anything worth respecting through her teachings.. she doesn't provide clear instructions, matter of fact, she HASNT taught me anything within this whole class over a period of close to 2-3 months now. So what am i gaining from this whole course? from what i feel and can see, clearly nothing. Except "gaining more wasted time." Like what's the point of me joining this class if i can't even learn from it...or gain anything out of it? she tells the students to learn from ecah other...but see, some kids don't even ahve experiences from photoshop..then how do they teach? she basically relies on those few people who actually have experiences with it to teach FOR HER--why? cuz she doesn't know how to actually use photoshop, mind the fact to even teach--she ain't capable of it. She hasn't taught us one thing this year, whereas, she ORDERS me to go around help the ones around me. i do so, and i'm "happy" at times and quite pissed at others because she orders me as if i'm forced to do it. I hate that feeling, and she shouldn't be able to do such a thing, i'm quite fed about the whole thing. and yes a course is TOTALLY where a student teaches another student, that's how it works. that's perfectly how it works. i just paid around $7000 to teach another student. that's how it works.. perfectly.. matter of fact, i paid 7000 and part of that money goes towards this farked up woman's salary FOR FORCING ME TO TEACH OTHERS AND HAVE HER SCREAM AT ME. man i've definitely loving this whole business..and it's totally the way everyone should work. FOR SURE NOT. i've dealt with enough of her, and had enough of this kind of woman that can't teach. and oh yeah.. she also expects so much from students assignments, and forces deadlines at whenever she pleases. Then guess what? some studnets actually stay up to work on various assigned projects FROM THIS WOMAN, even though they have other workloads to study/work for. Like honestly, media arts isn't as important as the other "Core" subjects like math and english. but see, there are students like me that actually want a future in graphic designs, and so i actually stay up to late hours and spend a lot of effort making something nice to hand in within that class. Then guess waht? after all the long hours of working, i go to class and she goes "oh it's not due till next week!" (when she clearly says "tomorrow" in the class before or something) She likes to change assignment due dates as her heart desires. this is definitely not fair for students that actually spend time on their projects. Then guess what for another time? after long hours of work for some projects, she would go "oh this one doesn't count becuase not everyone did it / finished it"..ok woman, that's now how the school system works. you say an assignment it's either they finish it and gain a mark or they don't finish it and get a 0 or a low mark. it's not the matter of finishing/not finishing and determining if the project should be included. we actually had to spend a few weeks working on two pieces of art that took quite a bit of my effort: "my paradise" and "my currencies" these were hand drawn art which we were REQUIRED to do. but see, she never marked them and when i asked her why.. she said "not everyone did it" so waht? if i dont do an assignment, then i can get 100%? because if it doesn't affect my mark, then i start off with 100%..so meaning i should get 100%. there shouln'dt be anything that affects it then. by her theory, that's how it works. i'm just following then.. but nope, if you don't do it intentionally, then your mark gets deducted and all. so how does her theory actaully work? oh i get it.. it bases on her "moment of feeling." Anything she desires to do, then it will happen as it is thought about. Did i mention that she told a close friend of mine, when they're done halfway through the project.. she says "oh change that, that's not what i want, and attempts to change the whole project" (while everyone is almost halfway done, and whereas my group is DONE.) so she expects EVERYRONE to change the whole project because of her own personal preference... honestly, that's not healthy or a good way of teaching. i'm sure many people will definitely agree with me on this one. Then moreover, she always tells me to sit down because i stand up too much right? well see, i as a person don't like sitting much, all my friends know this.. and this is PART of my characteristics. so basically she is challenging the way that i am, which in a way is a sense of discrimination. that i dont feel comfortable with. and then she tells me to sit down, with the harshest tone of voice. she does not say it nicely, but everytime it's with an intolerable rude voice. then after a series of these conversations, i just let down myself and i acutally sit down.. but then guess waht? she decides to play her little game and tells me to get up and go around the classroom to help the students around me. But see, i was doing this in the FIRST PLACE! and she told me to sit down. so what the heck does she really want from me. tells me to sit down and it displeases her, then tells me to stand up and she will yell at me later of not sitting down and distracting the classroom. i'm not doing any of those, and she accuses me of doing so. then when i try to speak of my own perspective and how i'm not distracting the classroom, she would exclaim that i'm dispecting her and that she's human, she will make mistakes too and that i ahve to to listen to her because she's an elder. but see woman, i am listening, but you ain't talking about logic...you're just basically saying random things to me that makes me don't even know how to handle her. this makes my feel really upset and confused. seriosuly i don't get the fact that i'm paying to suffer in a classroom, where i can actually spend that equivalent amoutn of time studying another course of like accounting. That was actually another course i thought about taking instead of media arts, but see i need art to go into what i want in my future career or studies. But she is NOT doing a good job at all, not even the slightest bit. Oh furthermore, she asked me to help her save a computer image off of her own email account DURING classtime. She tells us NOT to surf the internet or check our personal emails, but waht is she doing? she's using CLASS time and SCHOOL money to actually do her own thing. which ultimately contradicts to everything she says. then i ask her why is she checking her email, then you know what she replies with? "she's a teacher and she's allowed to but students are not and are expected to work" ok work on WHAT? you don't give us assignments 80% of the time and when you do, it's unclear and not-doable until later on (outside of school.) oh and guess waht? once she even asked me WHILE i was working on something, to help her SAVE AN IMAGE OFF HER EMAIL ACCOUNT. this is basics of basics in the world of computers in the days of today. but she doesn't konw how to do it. doesn't this make you question about her ability to even use a computer? it does to me. she's supposed to be a teacher of COMPUTER arts, but if she can't even use a computer right.. how does she actually teach the students photoshop, if photoshop is actually a big part of using hte computer? i don't get this fact. it doesn't support her either, it does not give a convincing factor to her abilities and qualification to teach the course. like what's the point of joining this class then? if she tells us to learn from others... why not just have a time of spare, and have the students just interact with each other and learn? that's the same thing. Cuz basically it's another spare for all the students in the classroom...many enjoy this factor because they basically have an extra spare (within gr11, as only one is permitted.) this makes it "pleasurable" for most students. but to me, it's just a time well-wasted. not something that i really wanna be part of, i rather you give me work and MARK RIGHTFULLY. But now it's time of spare, where it's governed by a teacher that screams with no reasoning...that's a great place to be. i love it. DEFINITELY NOT. i completely feel the sense of this course's uselessness. i do not in the slightest bit think this course is helping at all. No point of taking it.There can be ongoing things i can say about this pathetic "teacher" (can't even give her direct credit as a teacher, cuz she's never taught me anything as of yet...will she ever? that i won't konw, but what seems of now, not likely.)
That's just a glimpse of what i feel about this whole situation. If she doesn't change, i would definitely warn those who want to join this course, it's the stupidest couse and waste of time. Matter of fact, i recommend those who acutally respect art to not join this course; definitely no point.
started writing at 1:16 AM of Nov 23 2004 until 2:15 AM of Nov 23 2004.
1 Comments:
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dani said...
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its like WOAH thats a long entry =) dont worry. favourites or no..ur my favourite!!!
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Saturday, November 20, 2004
"it takes years to build up trust, but seconds to destroy it."That's one phrase i've encountered, and i agree with it very much. it's not something i'm happy about, nor is for a brother. it's funny how so many people take trust for granted, and don't ever really think about the days when that special something is lost. before a problem prevails, no one really acknowledges that the trust is actually a really hard earned thing, that is not easily earnable--mind the fact that is even harder to repair. trust is built through times together between two people, and it lasts with them until one of them finally makes a mistake. when that trust is built up so strong, that's when it is extremely dangerous. you do not keep any guard of whats to happen because you think nothing will be able to shatter that trust between you and your partner. but trust me, it's good to always keep a defense...cuz you do not want to crumble and fall.
When a trusted relationship is broken, from either side, it is hard to repair. people say time will allow it to heal itself, but how much time? can someone answer this question? i don't think anyone can actually answer that question with a definite answer, other than God. But we are not God, we cannot answer this. That 'time' may be at any point of time. It can be the next minute after the problem...it can be weeks and weeks of time...it can be months and months... it can be years...and it can be never. we'll never know the actual time that a trust will be repaired because it hurts a lot when the closest one to you mistrusts you. What can we do? give up? no, we should never give up..especially because your partner is that important to you. if you can leave that person after a case of mistrust happened, think twice--you're not as close as may think or you really need to shapen yourself up. To me, a trusted person will always be that trusted person, from before, to the future, and to eternity. Sure the person may lie again or hurt you once again...but if you are so close, then there shouldn't be such a problem to forgive your partner. Time will make itself heal, that's one thing for sure..but how long? it all really depends on the person.
With times that seem forever, broken relationships will sure to heal. It may take years before it can actually heal, but what is there to worry about if you have confidence about it? Some may think it's a waste of time to carry on the relationship within your heart even after many years....but that's not what i think. Think about it: you never let go of such person, and you have your problems...but if one day you see such person again, and he/she tells you that he/she is sorry about the whole thing and shouldn't of hated you for so long...imagine it. Don't you think that would satisfy you much more than merely a car or a million dollars? it certainly would to me. a car can be totally wrecked, and it's gone. money can be gone within seconds. But a friend is a friend that lasts forever, no matter what the problems are. Then you might argue with the fact, what if you decide to wait and wait..but that day never comes when you two are healed? here take this to mind, i really don't care. cuz i know i made my part of the "game" and i've tried my best to hold the whole thing together. If they don't accept it, then let it be. it's better than you stop and find another..then he/she comes back to you and it's messed up beyond anything.
Trust on it. Faith in it.
Have confidence about the whole thing.
Through God anything can happen, just give it time, and sustain it. Never said it'd be easy, because i know for a fact that it will be the hardest task that you face for your life. But trust me, when it comes, you'll be much more satisfied and in joy than any other thing on this earth.
That's how i see it. You don't have to agree, but that's how it is in my mind.
Hang in there.
i am, and i expect you to too bro.
3 Comments:
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heids said...
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hey bud.
hang in there. i know that don't help but i'm gonna say it anyway. thanks for all you help also. i think i would have gone insane without your help. keep rockin and take it easy kay? things will fall in place in their due time. you just gotta wait for it.
- heidi -
rahella said...
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hey stanstan. ah well, life's like that. it just throw things at you, and you might not necessarily catch it. well the ball's been thrown, and i missed it. soo.. well life goes on. cant complain, my life wasnt as poopie as others. so *shrugs* neways hope lifes good for you. thank God 1st term's over now im scared for the report card eek! anyway see you soon. loves
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aivoz said...
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okay.. your blogs are sooo long! hahaha.. they're great! hahaha.. nice to know you're bloggin again.. just another page i can visit everyday! heehee.. hang in there stan... God is faithful.. hehehehe.. YB4LIFE! nice newspaper layout! you are genuinely a wiz! haha... this has been a very very very random post! take care dude! hehehe..
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Tuesday, November 16, 2004
there will be no regret of what i must go through to get one thing i desire most. there were regrets of knowing you, but that was foolishness. i should have never thought about such thing. Never shall there be a regret. i have one regret about the whole thing: that is having a regret against the whole experience in the earlier days. it was stupid to have even thought about it. someone please slap me for this idiotic thought.
then again, i regret ever letting my own hands shatter that special link that we've shared. it's dumb of me, and now i must suffer through the consequences.. but that does not matter to me. i will not give up on the hope that i put into God's hands, and wait for that happy day. i stand here alone with God, for the return of you. Let the triangle be formed once again...for i feel empty without you, and crave for your hands once again.
i regret ever shattering it. that's one thing i havta say.
and on top of that, i'm beyond sorry.
Not sure if you will ever read this, but if you do, you do. if you don't you don't. Know that i will never change.
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Friday, November 12, 2004
Yeah, so cut my hair again, and a new style again...hehe. yepyep, i like it so far...and so does a couple of others haha....what do you guys think? I was gonna dye it purple..but it was gonna take 2-3 hours, so i didn't feel like waiting :P
anyways, as a grandpa to you dani, i care for you like the way you care for your actual grandpa. I will definitely pray for him and his recovery, i know you'll stand tall and be a support to him. Know that each and every one of us cares for him too...dont be sad, cheer up. He'll get to see God sooner, which is a good thing. Don't be upset about it, although, i konw it's losing a family member. But hey, he's gonna go with God and wait for your arrival there to live upon eternity. no worries k dani? I'll always be around to support and watch you; like a grandpa can to you. You have no doubt for any of those. God bless both of you. =)
Rmb, God's great; no worries! =D
2 Comments:
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helen said...
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yooooo luvin the new do..as in hair-do..k..wow..dumness ..anyway...so yea... at least one of us can decide on how to cut our hair..i've probably said im gonna go cut my hair a trillion times..but never deciding HOW to cut it...so...yea... ur the decisive corner while im the indecisive corner...how SWEET is that?!
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dani said...
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loving the new doo doo =) thanks a trilion for your support. whats better than living an eternity with God eh?
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Wednesday, November 10, 2004
Everything I do is for you,Your unpredictable but I still love you.
That's a part of the song i'm listening to right now, and it felt appropriate to post it.. dont ask me why, i duno... had the sudden urge to post it. But anyways, just wana blog about just today. It was a pleasant day, that i gotta admit. It all started from the morning of today...woke up at around 7, but just kept sleeping until the clock struck 730-ish...finally woke up and showered. Got to school around 8:34...yep, almost late...as usual...-_- Ha, but TOO bad! i wasn't late! i got in like right before canada ended...and jumped into class without him noticing. So yeah, was rather sick in the morning..kinda cold and runny nose... but that stopped after i woke up more. I was still pretty tired and all when i got to school.. but Dani, she cheered up my day..with the randomest comment ever =P from that point on, my day started to spark up...yep, you'd be surprised what little thing can do for a confused boy like me =) but anyways...from that class on, it was pretty boring...got to english next, that was okay.....still kinda boring. Lah..and physics, as funny as always...we cracked up during class when Mr.G tlaked really fast and how no one gets waht he's saying...and how derek just like gave up listening to him and decided to count his money instead hahah.... hilarious! =P anywho...lunch came along, and told lionel to get my lunch from the chinese store.. and he got me chicken balls?! LIKE HONESTLY?! 6 chicken balls for lunch..yes, that's REAL filling.. (sarcastic) so anyways.. gave away one to jones, and one to bri.. so i had 4 really...don't ask why i gave it away =P i just felt generous haha... but anyways, so basically starved the whole day until i got home when i had pizza *yum*! lalala.... oh yah, then world religion class, like usual..really fun. content was kinda boring..but the class itself is what makes it up. But lol, almost half the class was gone cuz they were all late for class....so all were sent to study...what a shame? =P neh, it helped my day i guess.... heheh.. anyways...moreover, at first, i was just gonna type notes for the missing people...well actually--nada and doora only =P but yeah..then dunno.. had the sudden twitch or sudden spark to get notes for them too.. .so went around and gathered notes for them and all...had around like 14 pages afterwards LoL....don't ask. I just wanted to do so. blah....anyways, found nada, and gave her the notes..and she thanked me. That was really pleasant to hear, since i miss this sincerity.....and for those who know me well enough, you'll understand what i mean! =D lala, ok enough of school events.
AFter all of that.. i just got home, had tutor for like 2 hours...so boring, yet fun. If that makes sense in ANY way.. hahaha....just learned and reviewed the annuity stuff that i got really confused in......cuz after that stupid TVM solver thing, i got really confused... hahah... i'm pretty stupid, so don't laugh! XD
later today, just went on msn and finished up all my workload...as well as the upcoming workload for future dates...(friday and monday) well..still doing WR, but whatever, it'll be easy....=) yah.. then on MSN, just had a talk with various people... and it felt really pleasant. Had a talk with dani, and just had many thoughts going around my head and stuff.. and i felt really close to her again....just how we're able to share stuff with each other..whenever we wanna...and she just outta the blue said that i'm an awesome friend...that was really heart-warming to hear. It feels so good when a close friend is able to say such about you. Then just joked around with her more, and she logged off after some time... then had a talk with doora, and she again said similiar things towards me...she thanked me for the notes and stuff that i've got her.....Then nada also said the same things towards me..and actually thinks i'm smart...that i dunno about lol :P but hey? how can i argue over her? nor do i wanna? so just accept it! keke... anyways, then after all of that...surprisingly, i had a talk with karen... i dun usually have a conversation with her...and even if i did, it'd be a short conversation...one or two replies, and it'd be over.. but today, it went on for a longer period of time...it was also pleasant. Dunno, she said the same things about me... how i'm relaly nice and all, and that the earth should have more people like me...that felt good to hear about such..although i dun really think i'm all that nice, but many have said that to me all today... it was actually pretty strange how all of today i have had gratitude shown towards me. I was able to feel really loved again, and i dunno..life seems to be growing towards the happy side again..the sadness is slowly departing..even though i still feel the pain and sadness of "that"...but that's aite.. i KNOW it'll be aite within time. Got confidence in Him and her. i know we can run through this all with the support from my family--all my close friends: you guys know who you are. no need to mention names now =P
anyways...gotta realize that God's great. I love this day, and i know he's blessed this day...it's been a great day and all..been able to get closer to each of my friends and even have a conversation with people that i don't talk to often...like even derek, i was able to get in touch with him. Also Karen, and just a few others....
Good feeling, good day, may it continue. =)
--- and guys, may i continue to be able to help you guys with the best of my ability.
1 Comments:
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dani said...
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you're completely and totally awesome. dont change for the world. unless you decide to dye ur hair pink or some METROSEXUAL colour lol.. =)!! now..should me and bri dye our hair pink? now that would be something funny..as in...it might ACTUALLY turn bri gay =) swEEt its soo a deal. neways stan..ur the bomb =)!!! *BIGG HUGG*
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Friday, November 05, 2004
well really, it's been a tough battle throughout my times with my closest friend and all. had our problems between us and it just really got us departed...not too happy about the situation, and not happy about myself of how i let that happen. i was pretty stupid to screw up such a wonderful relationship. yeah, people tell me that i shouldn't be uptight about it, or i should let go of it, or i should loosen up, or that it will get better within time... yeah, thanks guys, it's wonderful for your support from all your wonderful words... but still, it's realy hard to keep up with everything....i'm trying really hard to just sustain my confidence with this friend...and it's ripping me up whenever i let my guard down, and satan takes this to use for his advantage...either make me upset and cuss about it, or make me do something ungodly. it's really difficult guys... but i'll hang in there... but i'll definitely need you guys to support me throughout all the times....i dunno, yeah i have confidence and faith in God for bringing us back together...but it's still really hard to sustain that faith... i'm really worldly and i'm easily shaken....so i doubt on God sometimes...matter fact a lotta times...but i'm still able to shape up at certain points with friends that have not given up on me. they kept supporting me throughout all the times..... it's wonderful guys, and i appreciate it.Bri, thanks brother.. you've never let me down and you've never let me go. you always stood there and shot the words that were necessarily into me. you ain't scared of "losing" a friend...but you jsut care about getting the point across...thanks so much for that.... if it ain't for those times, then i'd probably failed in this "mission" probably about 10 times....thanks man. never forget your doings for me...owe ya big time.. yeah we're brothers, and you're probably gonna say "none needed" like how i always say that to you whenever you say thanks.. .but honestly man, straight from the heart, THANKS.
you're one that i can call brother, don't let that change. I'll try my best to sustain it all... but promise me one thing, try your best too.. i can't afford to lose such a close brother. i've lost people in my life, and you know those people are, just not another one.. i definitely won't be able to take it. Best of luck to you and me. God bless us both, and take great care of yourself ok? i'll always stick around you...but when the times i can't, remember....There's always people to listen up to you..OK? and there's that one person that will NEVER let you go, no matter what..--God.
Also for all the others that supported me throughout my hard times...it's still ongoing, and i just keep asking for your kindness to accepting me...even when i start to blow up...which usually is related to this. and i just ask for prayers from every one of you....thanks guys...owe you all big time.
This simple life of mine is made worthy and worth living cuz i have you guys standing by me all the time..plus God of course. thanks for all of the things each of you have done for me...you guys know what they are individually... i don't need to post about it for the public to see.. you know i'm thankful for you and your stuff for me....that's what counts the most...thanks guys. Just...well...you guys probably know.. i still hope for "that"...just keep praying about it.. that's all i really ask for....i dun care for a car, or money..what i want is her back.
-God bless all of you.
4 Comments:
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dani said...
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well what do i say except be strong. i know what its like to go through tough stuff but this is unimagineable to me. God wont give you anything that you cant handle. so stan just accept it. live through it. but continue to love her. miss her. and maybe in time it'll change. maybe it wont. be u have memories of her. and u'll have a lifetime of friendship. with you stan.. friendship NEVER dies!
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stan said...
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This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
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stan said...
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Dani: daw jeh! (thanks in chinese) haha... yeah..gotta thank you for your message...like yeah, i've heard it many many many times from various people.. but still hard to keep it up...but really, i guess i just need you guys to be there...really helps.
Rach: haha, maybe ;)
but oh well, what is there to be ashamed of? nothing =) lalala.....thanks for the blog =D thanks for the faith for it to happen...appreciate it deeply. Glad to see that we've gotten closer this year....realy happy about it. Keep it GROWING (in God too =D)!!! -
helen said...
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IM NOT GAY! =) hang in ther corner =)
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2 Comments:
555 soul buddies FOREVER =) hahaha..i think we're addicted to the site..how bout i buy you 5 CM jackets, 3 555 soul shirts, and hmm what else...how bout some shazzy car lol!!!! ALL FOR YOU =)
*jingle bells jingle bells* i need christmas NOW
"but in the other hand, it makes me sad to see thsoe i truly care about sad. What hurts more to you? yourself getting hurt or seeing your loved one hurt or upset? to me, seeing the other hurt and that i cannot do anything..but merely asking how they're doing.. that hurts me quite a lot. standing there...helpless, but still want to help. it hurts to see tears coming down your eyes, and it hurts to see that i can't do anything much except stand by you at all times. i duno what's going on, but i wanna know, but for now, i just pray that everything will continue to be smooth in your life.--for whatever reason, i hope that problem will be solved."
stan thank you, that paragraph means so much to me cuz i kno that therez someone experiencing the same thing as me.... thank you stan... yur wonderful ^___^
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