-- SLK32 --

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Just a question to ponder about:

is it a sin to care for others around you so much, that you may hurt yourself? (but you get a good effect out of it and it's for a good purpose and/or intention)

i've been thinking about that one..i still can't get over the fact that i care for others so much, that i can almost neglect myself from my own caring view. all i see is...my 2 brothers and my 3 sisters. they are the ones that i need to care most for, then i have the other surrounding me...those need care too... but myself, i dun really have care over myself that much..

and when i do start to care for myself, that's when the times are REAL rough...that i can't neglect myself anymore. but i know God's around to boost me up..cuz he lifts me to leave one pair of footsteps; instead of two--his and mine; side by side.

but recently, i broke down..in a stage of hyperness and depression and stress altogether. i got a phone call from nada, and all i was...was shaken. i was so stressed about the upcoming math test, and the upcoming problems to come..and the things i want to fix, and the things i hear...just so many things. i wnat to help every single one of my friends and at the same time..do my own stuff. i literally broke into a stage of insanity. i really felt the urge to visit a psychiatrist for the deseparate need. it was a strange feeling, but it's funny....

because through it, i was able to feel God once more. i prayed, i kneeled down at this point. i hung the phone up on nada, becuase i needed to focus on someone greater. someone of ultimate control and relief...even though she offered to comfort me and what not as the role of a sister. i kneeled and i prayed, and i was able to grasp my right mind...although still a bit woosy, i was able to fix myself.

math quiz or no math quiz...it's all the same. it's merely marks, i gotta focus on God. that's whats moore and most important. let it be.

Oh God. let you be my primary aim.
-Amen.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

0 Comments: