-- SLK32 --

Monday, February 14, 2005

it's really funny how i'm back on blogging now. i have thought that there wasn't a need for one of these anymore because life seems to be pulling together nicely in most aspects: friends, family, and whatever the hell. but it seems like i was wrong. sure things are getting better in some aspects, but there's also so many things that are downfalling. one after another, i realize the troubles coming forth. Each piling up again, and the burden that i carry around my shoulders gains another pound--more and more as each thing reveals itself. how do i handle this kind of thing? i don't really know. and honestly i don't even want to face it right now, cuz i just think everything's against me sort of thing. how i want to let go of everything right now and just live a mild life. i just want to get off all this shit, all this school stuff, all these burdens and just live a worldly life... why don't i do that? honest opinion, i do not know. i want to know why i'm still striving and still trying once after once after another. sure i have reasons, but my burdens getting heavy and i'm not in the shape to hold it anymore. i just want one long break, i don't really mind if it's like a lifetime break right now. burden's too heavy for me right now. God said He'll never give a burden that we cannot handle ourselves...but see, i don't see how that works right now because i do not agree with it. i really don't feel like fighting this battle...why not just let the opponents win? then it'll be over and end of story...seems much easier.

but whatever the hell, enough blogging now. i still have shitloads to write about for english and asp isp.. plus some math homework to do. so bye.

i really ask for God's guidance right now because i'm sinking as we speak. my language is back and my thinkin has changed; i don't even know how to strive anymore.

Monday, February 14, 2005

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